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The American Masculinity Podcast is hosted by Timothy Wienecke — licensed psychotherapist, Air Force veteran, and award-winning men's advocate. Real conversations about masculinity, mental health, trauma, fatherhood, leadership, and growth. Each episode offers expert insight and practical tools to help men show up differently — as partners, fathers, friends, and leaders. No yelling. No clichés. Just grounded, thoughtful masculinity for a changing world.

Episode Summary



What happens when two podcasters swap seats and interview each other about fatherhood and masculinity? In this crossover episode of American Masculinity and Daughtered, Tim Wienecke and Oscar explore what it means to raise daughters in today's world while redefining the old rules of masculinity.

From generational shifts in parenting to the lessons kids reflect back at us, this candid conversation blends lived experience with clinical insights. If you're a dad trying to show up better for your daughter-or a clinician helping men navigate fatherhood-you'll find practical wisdom here.

What You'll Learn

  • Why "presence" matters more than "perfection" in fatherhood
  • How chores and boredom build resilience in kids
  • The dangers of early sports specialization and burnout
  • Why intergenerational role models for fatherhood are fading
  • How men wrestle with unconditional vs. conditional love
  • Where the nuclear family model has (and hasn't) served us well

About the Guest

Oscar is the host of the Daughtered Podcast, where he explores the unique challenges and joys of raising daughters as a modern father. His raw honesty about presence, patience, and breaking generational patterns resonates with dads navigating the same journey. You can find his work at:👉 https://daughteredpodcast.com

Fact Check

We always check the research behind our conversations. Here are the main claims from this episode, with context, timestamps, and supporting evidence:

"The happiest kids are the ones that do chores." (Oscar, [00:26:00])Rossmann, M. M. (2002). Chores promote long-term success. University of Minnesota Longitudinal Study. Available at: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/324473918Whitesell, N. R., et al. (2019). Household responsibilities and child well-being. Journal of Family Psychology, 33(5), 553-564. https://doi.org/10.1177/2156869318820226

"For the last hundred years we've done parenting badly-at no other time were one or two people solely responsible for raising kids." (Tim, [00:12:00])Hrdy, S. B. (2009). Mothers and others: The evolutionary origins of mutual understanding. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press. https://press.princeton.edu/books/paperback/9780674060325/mothers-and-othersHewlett, B. S. (1991). Intimate fathers: The nature and context of Aka Pygmy paternal infant care. Ann Arbor: University of Michigan Press. https://www.cambridge.org/core/books/intimate-fathers/10.1017/CBO9780511527639

"Veteran suicide is significant among men over 75." (Tim, [01:02:00])U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. (2022). 2022 National Veteran Suicide Prevention Annual Report. Washington, DC: Office of Mental Health and Suicide Prevention. Available at: https://www.mentalhealth.va.gov/docs/data-sheets/2022/2022-National-Veteran-Suicide-Prevention-Annual-Report-FINAL-508.pdf

"Kids mirror your flaws back at you." (Oscar, [00:04:30])Bandura, A. (1977). Social learning theory. Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice Hall. https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1977-25733-000

"Most housewives in the 1950s were miserable." (Tim, [00:13:00])Friedan, B. (1963). The feminine mystique. New York: W. W. Norton.Rothman, B. K. (2001). Reproductive technology and feminist theory. Feminist Studies, 27(2), 341-365. https://doi.org/10.1080/713687594

"Parents should let kids be bored instead of making them happy." (Oscar, [00:29:00])Gray, P. (2011). The decline of play and the rise of psychopathology in children and adolescents. American Journal of Play, 3(4), 443-463. https://doi.org/10.1080/21594937.2011.578872

"Men shouldn't expect unconditional love outside of parenting." (Tim, [01:01:00])Bowlby, J. (1988). A secure base: Parent-child attachment and healthy human development. New York: Basic Books. https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1988-97634-000

"Sports burnout and injuries happen earlier now because kids specialize too young." (Tim, [01:07:30])Jayanthi, N. A., et al. (2016). Sports specialization in young athletes: Evidence-based recommendations. American Journal of Sports Medicine, 44(3), 794-801. https://doi.org/10.1177/0363546516643734

APA Citation Page:

References

Bandura, A. (1977). Social learning theory. Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice Hall. https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1977-25733-000

Bowlby, J. (1988). A secure base: Parent-child attachment and healthy human development. New York: Basic Books. https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1988-97634-000

Friedan, B. (1963). The feminine mystique. New York: W. W. Norton.

Gray, P. (2011). The decline of play and the rise of psychopathology in children and adolescents. American Journal of Play, 3(4), 443-463. https://doi.org/10.1080/21594937.2011.578872

Hewlett, B. S. (1991). Intimate fathers: The nature and context of Aka Pygmy paternal infant care. Ann Arbor: University of Michigan Press. https://www.cambridge.org/core/books/intimate-fathers/10.1017/CBO9780511527639

Hrdy, S. B. (2009). Mothers and others: The evolutionary origins of mutual understanding. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press. https://press.princeton.edu/books/paperback/9780674060325/mothers-and-others

Jayanthi, N. A., Pinkham, C., Dugas, L., Patrick, B., & LaBella, C. (2016). Sports specialization in young athletes: Evidence-based recommendations. American Journal of Sports Medicine, 44(3), 794-801. https://doi.org/10.1177/0363546516643734

Rossmann, M. M. (2002). Chores promote long-term success. University of Minnesota Longitudinal Study. https://www.researchgate.net/publication/324473918

Rothman, B. K. (2001). Reproductive technology and feminist theory. Feminist Studies, 27(2), 341-365. https://doi.org/10.1080/713687594

U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. (2022). 2022 National Veteran Suicide Prevention Annual Report. Washington, DC: Office of Mental Health and Suicide Prevention. https://www.mentalhealth.va.gov/docs/data-sheets/2022/2022-National-Veteran-Suicide-Prevention-Annual-Report-FINAL-508.pdf

Whitesell, N. R., Oblander, J., Dolezal, C., & others. (2019). Household responsibilities and child well-being. Journal of Family Psychology, 33(5), 553-564. https://doi.org/10.1177/2156869318820226



More Episodes: 23 | 22 | 21 | 20 | 19 | 18 | 17 | 16 | 15 | 14 | 13 | 12 | 11 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 5 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 1 | Intro


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